My life so far
- saw Manu Chao at Sydney Festival
- watched the most spectacular fireworks of my life
- visited the Sydney Opera House
- licked a Koala
- Kayaked around an island in Fiji
- hung out with my Grandma
- met a giant spider in my bathroom
- went to a murder mystery party
- started writing a novel
- built a user feedback app
- designed some christmas cards
- paletted the colors for my office's walls
- started jogging
- spoke at an event
- walked across the Harbour Bridge, drunk
- redesigned business collateral for my employer
- designed a kids website
- made CRO methodologies
- moved to Australia
- developed an SEO company's website
- pretended to be a DJ
- was Les Grossman for a night
- lost that love
- fell in love
- got a new job
- visited Alaska
- dropped out of college for SEO
- was nominated for a literary award
- learned how to bartend
- went to college
- worked as a video game beta tester
- went to Amsterdam
- got a passport
- dropped out of high school
- played drums in several rock bands
- visited Hawaii
- did lots of high school theatre
- worked at Cali Camp
- went on some cruises to Mexico
- played hockey for 6 years
- visited NYC
- acted on TV and stuff
- took singing lessons with Mr. Bill Edwards
- took dance lessons with Patsy Swayze
- spoke my first words
- I was born
Sydney destroys the USA for new year's eve celebrations.
I liked the Opera House.
Koala tastes like eucalyptus. Koala tounging action was so hot that the person taking the photo couldn't keep still.
What a trooper!
This, after it was already bombed to hell.
I was the murderer. Muahahaha.
A taste of things to come...
1. Darkness
Everything seems understated when you're lying at the bottom of an elevator shaft with your very own steel behemoth hurdling down at you. The parallel eclipse grows exponentially on its approach, faster and faster, and as it gets closer the light around its edges fades until darkness takes complete hold. I made this death trap months ago after the incident at the military compound where I scored my supply of C4 explosives. It's my coup de grâce. It's all going straight to hell this time, and I'm taking all of these godless freaks with me.
I always figured that, given my experiences, when the darkness began to set in and my eyes turned to black that I would react differently, somehow more in tune than the others. But the truth of it is that in the end there's only one pathetic question streaming through every synapse of my mind. No flashbacks, no recount of my entire life story, nothing to do about past regrets. And as I ponder the ironic nature of this question, I can't help but grin to myself:
Who is Anna Kelpie?
1. Darkness
Everything seems understated when you're lying at the bottom of an elevator shaft with your very own steel behemoth hurdling down at you. The parallel eclipse grows exponentially on its approach, faster and faster, and as it gets closer the light around its edges fades until darkness takes complete hold. I made this death trap months ago after the incident at the military compound where I scored my supply of C4 explosives. It's my coup de grâce. It's all going straight to hell this time, and I'm taking all of these godless freaks with me.
I always figured that, given my experiences, when the darkness began to set in and my eyes turned to black that I would react differently, somehow more in tune than the others. But the truth of it is that in the end there's only one pathetic question streaming through every synapse of my mind. No flashbacks, no recount of my entire life story, nothing to do about past regrets. And as I ponder the ironic nature of this question, I can't help but grin to myself:
Who is Anna Kelpie?
Merry Christmas!
Best time so far: 5km in 24:36 (15-12-11)
Keynote speech on user persuasion
@ The Internet Show, Sydney
Blackmore's Harbour 'Bridge Run' turned 'Bridge Crawl'
Letterheads, powerpoint templates, monthly newsletters, proposals, etc. all redesigned to present a more tech-savvy aesthetic.
Responsible for the original conceptual design, Photoshop mockups but not the programming or implementation
www.activeactivities.com.au
www.activeactivities.com.au
Outline of the Conversion Rate Optimization methodology that I developed for Bruce Clay Australia. It is in use today.
Welcome to Sydney!
Some tracks composed by DJ Scott:
The it in a u
Gold (Remix of a Madeon track)
Revolution (unfinished)
The Silmarillion
Light it Up
Exit
Okay, Flaming Dragon; Fuck-face.
But it's better to have and lose than never to have at all.
A condition that I seem to be naturally predisposed to, that causes both unimaginable pleasure and unspeakable suffering.
Note to employers: It is amazingly easy to get a broke college student to drop out for full-time work simply by offering them a salary.
Note to students: Hindsight's a bitch.
Note to students: Hindsight's a bitch.
My very first college essay ever. Wish that I could remember what the award was called. Thanks for all your support Mr. McGee, even though I never showed for the final.
Well, Moorpark College which is actually a great school. Majored in US History / Anthropology.
This was my life for about 6 months. It was awesome.
Being stoned when you take your passport photo makes customs officials give you interesting looks.
They were "Oh shit"
